What to Do If Your Child Receives a Threatening Message Online
“I know where you live.” “I’m going to tell everyone.” “Pay me or else.” “You’re going to regret this.”
If your child has shown you a message like one of these — or if you’ve found one on their device — the first thing to know is that your child did the right thing by telling you. And the second thing to know is that you can handle this.
Threatening messages aimed at young people online take a few different forms, and the way you respond depends partly on the type. But the core steps are the same regardless.
The Types of Messages Kids Receive
Sextortion threats involve someone who has — or claims to have — an intimate image and is threatening to share it unless the child pays money or shares more images. These are among the most distressing because they weaponise shame.
Cyberbullying and harassment can come from peers — classmates, former friends, people from school — and often involves threats to embarrass, expose, or physically harm. These messages may be part of an ongoing pattern rather than a single incident.
Threats from strangers in gaming environments are common in competitive games. Most are empty rage — someone who lost a match and typed something they don’t mean. These are usually the least serious, but they still deserve attention.
Threatening demands tied to money — “send me gift cards or I’ll tell your parents what you’ve been doing” — target kids who’ve been manipulated into a situation and are now being extorted. These are organised scams and should be reported.
The First Rule: Don’t Delete Anything
When a child shows you a threatening message, the instinct is often to get rid of it — to take away the awful thing that’s causing distress. Resist that instinct.
The messages, screenshots, and any profile information visible are evidence. They may be needed if you report to police or to the platform. Before taking any other action, screenshot everything. Screenshot the message itself, the profile of the person who sent it, and any conversation leading up to it. Save those screenshots somewhere they won’t be lost.
After you’ve documented everything, then you can block the sender.
What to Tell Your Child Right Now
The most important thing your child needs to hear — before you do anything else — is this: You are not in trouble. This is not your fault. You did the right thing telling me.
Many children stay silent about threats because they’re afraid a parent will be angry, will take away their devices, or will make the situation worse. The fact that your child came to you is a sign of trust. Protect that.
Be specific about your reaction. “I’m not upset with you. I’m glad you showed me this. Now let’s figure out what to do together.” Children who feel safe with their parents are far more likely to disclose problems early — which is when intervention is most effective.
Reporting Options in Canada
To the platform: Every major platform (Instagram, TikTok, Roblox, Discord, Snapchat, etc.) has a reporting function. Use it. Even if moderation is slow, a documented report creates a record. For serious threats, use the “harassment” or “threats of violence” reporting category specifically.
To the Canadian Anti-Fraud Centre (CAFC): If the threat involves a financial demand, report it at antifraudcentre.ca or call 1-888-495-8501. The CAFC recorded $492 million in reported fraud losses from Canadians in 2024 — financial threats against minors are part of what they track and investigate.
To local police: If the threat involves physical safety, the person making threats appears to know your child’s real-world location, or the threat is part of a pattern of harassment, contact your local police service. In many cities you can also file a report online for non-urgent matters.
For intimate image threats involving minors: Contact the Canadian Centre for Child Protection at cybertip.ca. They work specifically on cases involving children and are experienced in this area.
What About the Threat Itself?
In most cases — especially with sextortion and gaming-related threats — the threats are not carried out once the scammer realises they won’t get what they want. That does not mean they should be ignored, but it does mean the right move is usually to stop engaging, document, and report rather than comply.
Complying — paying money, sharing more images — does not end the situation. It typically escalates it.
One Thing to Do
Tell your child: “If you ever get a message that scares you or makes you feel threatened, screenshot it and bring it to me right away. You will not be in trouble for showing me.”
That instruction, said clearly and without alarm, gives your child a plan for a moment when they’ll feel anything but calm.